Avoidance Cycle: Do You Often Find Yourself Caught in this Loop?
Avoidance cycle is exactly what it sounds like. It involves the means in which we take to avoid tackling tasks or facing certain responsibilities. And guess what? Many of us dealing with perfectionism often find ourselves procrastinating or pushing off certain tasks.
For those of us who are easily overwhelmed when it comes to achieving certain goals or simply fulfilling necessary responsibilities, we can easily find ourselves caught in an avoidance cycle. Let’s have a closer look at what an avoidance cycle looks and sounds like and then have a look at some healthy, achievable solutions.
What Does an Avoidance Cycle Look and Sound Like?
If the idea of an avoidance cycle resonated with you, we’re going to break it down in a clear and concise way so you can easily identify when you might be stepping into its circuit.
The first sensation of an avoidance cycle can be feelings of anxiety, stress or feeling overwhelmed after looking or acknowledging a task that requires your attention.
Then, instead of taking on the task head on, you distract yourself with easier tasks in order to cope with feeling overwhelmed. You know exactly what we’re referring to. It can be something like cleaning the house, scrolling through social media, answering messages, watching tv, shopping and any other default distraction you may have up your sleeve.
What follows are feelings of guilt for distracting yourself, followed by feelings of inadequacies.
Then you go back to the task that may be demanding your attention and start working but you feel inadequate and overwhelmed
- and so the cycle starts all over again
An Example of the Avoidance Cycle
You need to look into car insurance that offers a better rate (that’s your task at hand). Then you start feeling overwhelmed and frustrated.
You notice that the date is a month away so you decide to leave the task for a later time and you focus on something else (that’s where your distraction comes into play).
You then notice the insurance letter on your desk and you put it away on a pile and start to feel more anxious and guilty for not being responsible enough to take care of what you know you need to take care of.
You then look at the date and wonder if it actually needs to be done. Then your deadline is a week away and you still feel overwhelmed, maybe even more so, and so you leave it to the last minute, when it’s stressful, overwhelming and feel guilt-ridden for not having taken care of it sooner.
Solutions to Keep yourself out of an Avoidance Cycle
Take baby steps. Set aside just 30 minutes to an hour in your schedule to tackle and take care of the first few steps of that task, but remind yourself you are only setting the groundwork and aren’t expected to do everything within that hour. Then set aside an hour in a few days or the next week, depending on your deadline, and take it one step further.
Remind yourself why it’s important that you take care of that task and all the reasons why you are capable of taking care of that task in a calm way. I.e. Because you are smart, intelligent, clever, focused and capable.
Breathe and Meditate if you need to. Take deep breaths before taking the first few steps of the task until you feel calm and grounded. Remind yourself that you can tackle this thing and that you are ready to focus on it. Meditate until you feel ready to focus on the task and imagine how you will feel once you’ve completed that task.
Prepare and drink a coffee or tea before confronting the task. Whether it’s coffee that gets you inspired and gets you going, or its a soothing herbal tea that will help you focus, set up props that are signals to your brain that you are about to sit and work on something that requires your attention and time. Set up simple cues for yourself that help you feel motivated or focused - whether it’s a bar of dark chocolate, or a piece of hot chocolate cake, you are setting yourself up to sit, focus and take a few steps closer to your goal. You deserve a reward and to enjoy the process!
More Blog Post’s you’ll Enjoy
Overcoming the Belief I am A Failure
How to Move Beyond Shame and Guilt
Relatable Podcast Episodes you’ll Enjoy from: It Didn’t Break Me Podcast
Uncovering Your Internal Value with Tina Morales
Challenging Stigmas Through Our Stories
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