Tips on How to Let Go of The Need to Control
Feeling like you need to control everything can be really stressful.
A lot of us are dealing with our need to control and learning how to let go a little, no matter how scary it may be. But instead of feeling like you’re doing this all on your own, here are some really useful tips that can help guide you along the path of ‘release.’ And remember, take what works for you and be gentle with yourself. Don’t expect change right away, because this is a part of a beautiful process.
Tip 1: It’s Time to Get To Writing
Step One: Write down everything that stresses you, that gives you anxiety and all the things that may trigger depression.
Step Two: Next to each trigger, write down what is in your control and what is out of your control.
Step Three: Make the decision to give yourself permission to let go of the things that are out of your control. And, anytime it comes back up, because in all likelihood it will, just remind yourself that you’ve let that go.
Being intentional will take time. However, when we write it out, and we are able to have that awareness when a similar situation or feelings come up again, then we’re more likely to be able to observe how that stress is taking up all that useful space. You can let that go.
Tip 2: Asking for Help
Ask for help and be open to what you may discover. You may be surprised by the kind of advice or guidance you receive. Sometimes we think we're the only ones who can handle or manage this thing, but when we go to someone who possesses their own perspective, expertise and ideas, we discover something new.
When we ask for help, we can adopt the mindset that we are exploring and discovering. The advice or help we receive might not have been exactly what we were looking for, but we can appreciate who that person is and how they can help us in their own unique way.
Tip 3: Exploration
When we're letting go of control, how about setting our mind to being the explorer? This method is about exploring and discovering the way our minds work.
We are learning to be more patient with ourselves. We’re understanding now why we’re trying to control a situation and what we may have experienced in the past that could be triggering this need to control. Explore that and be patient and kind to yourself as you discover some new things about yourself.
Very often our need to control comes from a time when we needed to protect ourselves from someone or something. When we are not in danger, we don't need to protect ourselves. And hey! Here's the beauty in where you are right now! You’re not in danger and you don't need to protect yourself, and who knows? Maybe you don't really need to try and completely control this situation, those feelings, that way of thinking, or whatever it is you're dealing with at the moment?
Tip 4: Imagination
It’s time to push that fear aside and let something new in. Sometimes we’re afraid of letting go and we begin to imagine all the things that could go wrong. But how about imagining all the great things that can unfold when, and if, you let go of that control? Write it down or take time to imagine all the possibilities of what could happen when you let that control go.
Letting go is true freedom and gives you space to connect to your true and authentic self.
Any more questions you may have for me, please reach out to me. I always love hearing from my community.
More Blog Post’s you’ll Enjoy
Why We Feel the Need to Control?
Overcoming the Belief I am A Failure
How to Move Beyond Shame and Guilt
Relatable Podcast Episodes you’ll Enjoy from: It Didn’t Break Me Podcast
Breaking Free from Approval Addiction with Kimberly Valerie
"Embracing the And" with Faith Broussard Cade
Releasing Control When You Have No Control with Jessica Stephens
Connect With Bianca Hughes
Follow the “It Didn’t Break Me Podcast” on your favourite podcast player
Sign up to the newsletter (I provide tips and insights on overcoming perfectionism so you can embrace your imperfections and authentically be you together with my day to experiences of discovering the beauty within the mess).
Instagram: @authenticallybeyou (I am active here the most 🙂)
LinkedIn: Bianca Hughes
Pinterest: @authenticallybeyou